Is the Past Your Present?

It is extremely easy to continue to focus on the old, familiar experiences and recreate them in the present, either with the same people or the new ones, in similar circumstances or new ones.

Some face this particular problem when it comes to manifesting relationships – they continue to focus on past experiences even when they don’t want to, allowing their minds to run wild into the chaos of history which should have long been forgotten.

When allowing oneself to bring the mayhem of their past into their new relationship, bringing old fears into new relationships which are completely unrelated to the new person they are with, they can literally ruin their present relationship for both themselves and their partner. They can cause annoyance difficult to recover from, only because they never got entirely clear on what exactly they want from the present. Instead of putting effort into thinking what kind of relationship they want to have now, they recreate their past, unsuccessful ones.

This is why I write down the relationship I want to have at that specific time. I don’t care for a chaotic mind – it has nothing to do with the present or the other person involved. It has to do with the perception of the past as it is today, not always even the situation as it was back then.  What you perceive to be a big deal may have long been forgotten by the other person or not perceived as such at all. I say this because some of you have mentioned some unbearable past events that still cause you pain today.

Each of us is responsible in keeping focus on what we desire in order to manifest it. My continuous preaching of self-love and self-confidence provides the perfect focus on your own life instead of worrying what someone you like is thinking. When you like yourself that much, you are focused on enjoying your own life – then, many are eager to be a part of it. More importantly, you can easily see the specific people you want to get close to being a part of that life.

Today, I went out to get some face wash gel and came back home with a variety of beauty products as well as a new pair of shoes. Last night, I had an amazing night with one of my closest friends. It’s time to go out dancing with some of our friends soon. I am planning a trip to see a friend whom I hadn’t spent time with in two and a half years (!) and I am finishing my book while lecturing and advising students and professors on communication matters at a university. What is there not to like about my life? I liked it when I was in college and working. I loved it when I was doing my Master’s and was going out every night at the same time. I loved it when I was unemployed for almost a year after that but visited five different countries to see friends. Life is amazing.

Your life exists so that you give it focus. You are meant to be focusing on yourself, allowing those you want to come and share that life with you. When you appreciate yourself, you are capable of openly appreciating someone else easily.  Even if you don’t have a specific person in mind, you’ll appreciate new prospects and all your friends even more. You’ll appreciate everyone in your life even more than you do now.


  1. Hi Nina, as you know my focus for many years now has been on one specific person (even though my issues also were apparent in most of my past relationships too). Does the LOA affect who other people are in your life? Like if someone you love had a propensity to cheat, can you manifest that the particular person be faithful to you? I don’t know if that question makes sense?

    Does it work with the same certainty regardless of who that person is? I guess the question is, csn the LOA affect who other people are with certainty, or does that violate their freedom, if that’s not who they are?

    The reason I’m asking is because in one of Brandon Martins question and answers, a woman asked if it was possible to Change a guy that has player tendencies? Brandon’s answer was that it’s best to,give up on a guy like that, because some guys cannot change


    1. It works just the same no matter who it is, if you believe you can have what you want. We are all connected. However, the way players behave makes it difficult for people to love them, that’s the problem, and you have to feel love for someone to influence them with that love and want to make them happy.
      You don’t violate anyone’s freedom because you don’t OWN anyone, now or ever. You don’t own people you’re in a relationship with – you simply love them and allow them to love you back if you feel good about yourself, them and your relationship with them. If you influence someone with love and want to be happy as well as want to be happy with them while feeling respect and compassion for them, focusing on their positive qualities, you can love them and they can love you back.
      There is nothing worse than being in a relationship with someone who tries to turn you into their idea of a partner. However, there is a difference between someone suffocating you and thinking you should want to fulfill their needs because they confuse neediness for love, and someone who loves you for who you are and respects your wishes which makes you want to be with them and create a life with them.


  2. Nina,

    I am at my best when I’m loving myself, feeling confident in myself and enjoying my life more. Great things have been happening lately, and I see evidence of my vibration raising. When I think of my guy, I feel my heart open up. The desire emitting from it feels AMAZING!!! I can now visualize us together happy, and I can see him loving me fully and without boundaries. I always hesitated before. But now, it feels like the most natural feeling in the world. That he loves me with his whole heart.

    Now every time I think of him, it feels joyful, real and right on every level. I’ve been so happy almost 2 weeks now and I think it’s because I’ve finally overcome the majority of the resistance that kept pointing out what was triggering the negative emotions. I paid attention, and moved it all out of the way. Now, it just feels pure.

    So much so that I feel like I don’t need him in my life to be happy. He supplements my happiness, but isn’t the focal point of it. And that feels better than anything else I’ve felt since a long time. I’m focusing on my goals, hobbies I want to pursue and making myself happy. Because of that I can think of him without resistance. It’s very true what you say that we need to make our happiness and self love a priority. Everything can fall more easily into place after that. There’s very little room for resistance after that.

    I’m loving the momentum, and I can feel my life unfolding even thought the evidence isn’t there to show me. What an amazing feeling to have. I feel so free, and I trust the universe to deliver my desires in perfect timing and in the easiest way possible. It’s not my job or my business to know how that’s going to happen. It simply doesn’t matter. What matters is our life together in the relationship I know is possible.

    You’re so right Nina, we need to put ourselves first. It sounds too simplistic, but it’s absolutely true.

    Lots of love to you Nina, and my fellow manifestors.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Yes! I know I am doing this.

    Hi Nina. I feel like a broken record. I apologize.

    I am so confused. I am feeling stuck in a loop. I want my boyfriend back but I am having a hard time getting the feeling of having him back. I am too aware of his not contacting me, which (I believe) is causing him to not contact me, which is making me aware of it, which is causing it… Ugh! How do I get off this merry go round? Sometimes, I feel really good and I think, “Hey, I’m happy, why isn’t my man contacting me?” lol. I know I am impatient.

    I need that device from Men In Black that erases the bad thoughts and replaces it with good ones. Anyone have one of those?! : )



    1. You feel the need for him to contact you since you notice that this is missing. Need creates more need so it’s important that you visualize what it’s like to have your desire now and believe it’s yours.


  4. Hi Nina,

    Ive been trying writing since you mentioned writing your affirmations help. Sometimes I feel a little sadness as I write what I want, but I try to not indulge in it too much so that I can feel love again.

    What do you do when your subconscious fights what you’re trying to affirm?

    Also, how much writing do you do? I’m writing over an over that I’m grateful, that im happy and that I make him happy. How much do you normally do it?


    1. Very little because the writing is used to create the feeling of having it. Always connect writing or any other techniques with the feeling of having it. I love visualization because it gives me a chance to imagine doing something fun, having manifested my desire. It gives me a chance to LOVE having it in my life! 😀 You’re manifesting a relationship so you could imagine doing so many fun things with your man! 😀
      You can either write affirmations or write a story about you two and then if you like it, read it when you feel like. You might not even have to read it more than once because writing it might be enough to create the feeling of having your desire in your life.
      Just remember that LoA techniques work best when you have fun with them so you should visualize or write something that you love. Maybe a diary entry of an amazing day you two just had? 😀 Or, if you don’t feel that creative, you can write the affirmations we talked about but start from a relaxed mind and a good mood. Write affirmations of your relationship and how it feels like. Let the feeling of having and loving it fill you with love because the feeling of living your desire is the goal 😀 Writing is great because you start to believe your desire belongs to you already very soon after you engage in it.
      I either write what the relationship is like in the form of affirmations. I am, we are, etc., etc.. Or, I write a little one page story if I feel like it. With some specific people, I felt it without writing anything down, just asking and letting go.
      Writing is a terrific technique because it truly makes your desire feel real when you read it.
      What do you like from these suggestions? 😀


      1. I do like writing… like yesterday I was putting “i’m grateful for the relationship I have with …” “I’m very grateful that I’m the person he is in love with and that makes him happy” “He is an amazing partner to me”. My only challenge is that my inner voice goes “No you aren’t”, “No you don’t”, and just like when I say my affirmations or visualize, I feel a little sad when I realize that right now, they are not true and nothing is really showing that he is moving in that direction.

        I was just wondering if affirmations start to work after time, like maybe if i keep going, someday I’ll believe them?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Removing the need to see any evidence is essential. If you feel the need to see evidence, you will even struggle to see signs, let alone anything else. You don’t need that plus it ruins your mood and therefore blocks your manifestation.
        When you believe that your desire belongs to you, affirmations only make you feel EVEN better!
        Dedicate a few days to affirmations and you will already start to believe them. When boosted by positive energy, affirmations translate into belief fast. Keep enjoying your life because your priority is to feel good because then, you will believe affirmations even more profoundly, if you will. Practice affirmations, written or verbal, and make feeling good your priority. Enjoy yourself, write and you’ll feel better very soon 😀
        When your desire gives you a heavy or a negative feeling, go and do something else that you enjoy to raise your vibration. Sometimes, it’s normal to feel like you’ve had enough of thinking about your relationship and you feel the need to also do other things in life. Then, go out and do them 😀 You’ll soon feel better.
        You asked me why I was able to let go to receive fast. It is because it makes me feel good to think that I am living my desire and that if that desire is a relationship with someone specific, that I make him incredibly happy because he also makes me happy 😀 Feel great about yourself as a person, as a woman and as someone who just brings joy to her loved ones 😀


  5. C

    Have you found a Bars Facilitator yet? These things you talk about will become a thing of the past. You’ll look back and wonder how you ever thought those judgements of yourself. Have you ever seen me come on here anymore like i used to? All upset and all those godawful beliefs I used to have about myself. What a twit I was to believe that I wasn’t good enough for anyone or anything. This is just something you have learnt from either people around you or the world. You won’t ever see me post anything upsetting anymore because BARS deletes these beliefs you have of yourself and it does NOT return. It will change your life.

    I was in the same position thinking and saying what you do. It’s been a month since my first Bars session and now I do it on other people and i know now that I AM GOOD ENOUGH and no thoughts come into my head that ever contradict or make me think otherwise. The ‘voices’ have been forever silenced.

    It also helped me let go of him and think “whatever happens, happens.’

    Really recommend you get this work done.


    Put in your county and state and look for the initials BF next to the photos of people that come up in your area. Call them and say these are my issues. I need my Bars Run and I need clearing statements to remove these judgements I have about myself.

    If you want permanent change this is it.

    With Love Gretta. x


    1. Thank you Gretta, I wasn’t sure how much it would cost in my area, but I also could not find anyone in my immediate area.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.