You Get What You Give in Manifesting Relationships

You get what you give – we often hear this phrase when dealing with LoA. I often say it but I find it comforting. Why shouldn’t I receive a great life while sending positive vibes out into the world?

But what does this idea mean in terms of manifesting relationships?

“You get what you give” means being an amazing person and believing that your partner is one so that you could attract the kind of relationship you want with that person. If you believe that the both of you are amazing people, you will believe in the possibility of your desired relationship with that person. Whether you are manifesting being with a specific or a generic person you haven’t met yet, it means knowing that the relationship you want is yours and being the kind of person that deserves it, which means being the person who is convinced of deserving to live their desires.

You already are an amazing person and so is the person you are manifesting being with. Now, all you have to do is believe in it. Neither of you needs to be superhuman – you are both amazing just as you are.

I use the term “amazing” but you can use any term you want – “great,” “kind,” “good” or simply, “deserving.” Use anything you want!

If you don’t believe that you can manifest your desire just yet, make sure to be the kind of person you admire! Accept that you are good enough now but if you need to, improve yourself as well. Do the things you always wanted to do. Contribute to yourself and the world. Do whatever you need to do in order to finally realize that you are an amazing individual.

You must love yourself first so that you could love another and offer them a reason to come into your life.


When manifesting relationships, laying the groundwork is important in order to offer someone else a happy partnership. You are making sure you’re happy so that you could be the perfect partner.

If you feel that way already, just ask and receive but if you feel like you need some prep, keep reading.

Many want to manifest a relationship at the time they are unhappy which doesn’t make them a good partner. This is manifesting out of need, not love. Instead, these individuals need to be happy with what they already have in order to gain even more and be an amazing partner just the way they are.

Manifesting relationships is a serious thing because you must be a quality person in order to attract a quality partner and relationship. If you don’t feel good enough, the problem lies in your beliefs about what exactly quality means.

Too many people fear that quality means physical perfection, financial wealth, fame, fortune and similar things. They base the idea of quality on the external factors so much that they forget it is all about the internal. Not even your looks mean anything because it is all about your inner energy and if you look back on your life, you would understand why this is true, especially after observing your past relationships.

I realized a long time ago that looks, age, financial wealth or any other external factors don’t matter. Only those who think their looks and similar factors matter end up lowering their level of attraction to others. Those who believe that everyone will deem them amazing only if they do so themselves end up attracting whomever they want!

For all these reasons, giving love to yourself means laying the groundwork for a successful relationship.


  1. Hi Nina,

    Great post. I understand what you say when you mention that we need to feel that we are amazing and our partner is too. What about when they genuinely do things that hurt us. How are we supposed to feel positive about someone when we are hurt by something they did?

    Thank you,


    1. Honey bun, I’m just going to give you my 2 cents and say this with lots of love : you can’t write a new chapter if you keep re-reading the old one. You don’t have to choose this person to manifest but if you do choose this person it should because you love them. And if you love them, thinking about them positively comes naturally. You can’t love them and not be able to think or feel positive about them at then same time because these emotions come from completely opposite directions.

      This is the fascinating part of this process : if you can’t think positively about the person, it might be the opportunity to ask yourself : do you really love them or have they just become your habit? Do you really want to be with them or do you feel you’ve spent so much time investing on this that the thought of changing your mind makes you feel terrible and like you wasted your time ?

      Why would you choose to be and focus on someone it is hard to feel good about and you have so much resistance towards ?

      Maybe it might be best to reevaluate what it is you truly want beyond the person , remove him from the equation because he really is just a vessel – if it was just him you wanted you’d be happy to just see him, or talk to him without anything more- but you really want is the relationship , in this case ideally with him.

      So think about the relationship you want, if thinking about him gives you resistance. Think about how it would feel to have that amazing relationship where you feel loved, appreciated, attractive, cherished, valued, acknowledged and safe enough to not worry – just that is enough to to make you raise your vibration and feel better which is the bottom line of everything : to feel good – to feel so good that there is no resistance there and anything can happen becUse you’re allowing and expectancy of wonderful things –

      That is when inevitably your relationship will manifest because that is what you will have put in when focusing on what you actually want an deserve – ideally the relationship will be with him but you know what if it’s not win him you won’t care because you’ll be so tremendously happy – and being tremendously happy will automatically bring him about but then YOU will get to decide if it’s still who you want …

      To get there though – you need to let the current situation go, set yourself free … You deserve to be happy but you have to take that leap of faith and let go of what isn’t conducive to making you feel happy in the first place.

      Hope I helped a little 🙂


      1. I agree with you 100% Lyly. My question to Nina was more about what we can do to handle the situation ourselves. For example, if there is a situation where someone hurts us, but we love them and dont want conflict/resistance, what can we do to get over it. What can i say to myself to understand the situation from their point of view. Or say to myself to get over the hurt/resentment feelings? I do think that regardless how perfect any of us or our significant others are, we are human and our egos sometimes get hurt, or we resent someone for how they treated us. I just want to understand the best way to handle that. Maybe it its as simple as just realizing that your ego is the one having the feelings?

        I have a girlfriend who was once almost convinced her husband was having an affair, however, they stayed together and there was no conflict. I also don’t think he was having an affair, she was just jealous because the woman was attractive and her husband had mentioned how in shape the other woman was. I think my friend got very insecure because she personally didn’t feel good about her body and also that her husband was very much into fitness himself, so she must have already had feelings or fears that her body wasn’t good enough for him.

        In any case, any negative feelings she had did not result in her marriage falling apart, thank god. I’m trying to understand the difference in what she did and what I did i guess.


      2. She just had some paranoid feelings and I think she was only expressing her dissatisfaction with her body, like you said. But you made a great point – if you can simply understand that people make mistakes and we might take those mistakes a little too personally, we can forgive.


      3. That’s what I meant in the sense that if you hold on to the love you get passed the hurt because you love more than you’re afraid. But if you focus on the hurt and keep telling the story of what happened you can’t get passed the hurt.

        you can do all the EFTs, switch words and meditations – but maybe you should look into why you hold on to the hurt more than you hold on to the love, it says more about you than it does about him.

        Your friend may have though he was cheating but may be she had no doubt he loved her, as you say the issue was more about her than it was about him – but somehow she held on to the love more than she did to the fear which might be why the marriage stuck because the love was enough for her to not fully let her fear take over.

        Why isnt the love enough to help you get over the hurt and situation might be a good question to start with maybe ?

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Hi Lyly,

        Thank you. I’m actually doing ok right now. Time has healed my feelings quite a bit. I was more asking for future because in history, it has been an issue for me that causes to feel fear and I want to know how to handle it in the future.


      5. Good question. Maybe it means there isn’t enough love there? Or, there is, and is only masked by the ego. I am only now paraphrasing what all of you wrote which makes me so impressed with your understanding of it ❤ Now, the only question is what you truly want.


    2. Hi! And thank you 🙂 You must forgive both yourself and them first so that you stop feeling hurt by it. When you have nothing but positive feelings, you can manifest.


      1. Thank you nina,

        This is one area that has confused me a little. I know in the past you have mentioned that I’m too hard on myself and that I worry if I’m doing things perfectly in this process. I agree 100% on this and I want to change this because I feel like I punish myself a lot.

        But, when I manifested this past trip I was really excited. I started having my concerns when I started seeing behavior from him that was concerning. So, my confusion is this. If you are manifesting this, and you’ve been positive…. Will you see things that test your faith? Is this how the universe works to see if you believe?

        Or when he told me that he didn’t love me like that?. Were those tests?

        This is why I feel like I have to be perfect in my thoughts because although I’m on a good path and really believe that I’m manifesting, I still see and experience things that hurt me. This is where I really get confused. Like on this trip when I heard him say things that I had written out, I was so happy and amazed that things were happening. All it took was a moment of feeling down and worrying about another person to spiral everything out of control and my desire fell away from me. It really was just one or two moments. That is why I get so concerned that I need to be perfect in my thoughts because in my experience it happened this way

        What are your thoughts on this?


      2. When things you see as testing your faith appear, your reaction to them shows your awareness. If you know your desire will manifest, you ignore those things. On the other hand, if you allow his behavior to affect you, you are still too attached and don’t feel like your desire belongs to you already.


  2. Hi C & Nina & All

    C …. I know how you feel, I know you already know that, but just think how fortunate you are that he is contacting you. Focus on that. You can see by talking a break it released something and there he was. Be grateful for that. I’d be super grateful to receive any kind of communication right now.

    You could try chanting the switch words… BOW – CONCEDE – RELEASE – RESISTANCE – TOGETHER – DIVINE.
    CONCEDE – CLEAR – CENTRE – FIND – DIVINE – LOVE – WITH – (insert his name here)
    Each one 200 times a day. You can memorize it easily.
    I did BE – ADJUST – HO – CRYSTAL for my neck last night because I don’t have much movement (pulled it) have woken this morning with about 90% pain gone.
    Switch words DO work.

    When those thoughts come up that you don’t like you can just say the switch word CANCEL – OFF.

    And until you can memorize all the phrases above you can just say DIVINE – TOGETHER. For you and him but the ones above are important they release resistance.

    I was listening to an Abe video last night and I saw one the commenters say “believe he loves you and that’s how it will be, flow downstream.”

    Lyly is right in everything she has said. You could also try that thing I mentioned a few weeks ago which is attract based on like you’ve only just met him.

    Nina… Yesterday at work they were going to throw some books into recycling and I quickly grabbed one that caught my eye called ‘Miracles’ by Stuart Wilde. I don’t think it was coincidental that I was again near the Scottish lady when I saw it. She seems to be there when something awesome happens to me. Also the name of the book, ‘Miracles’ just like my ‘Little Miracles’ shelter dream. This is what the book is about – “Stuart makes the point that creating miracles in our lives is no more complicated than understanding the metaphysics of the Universal Law, which states that within human beings there lies an immense power . . . and this power is impartial and unemotional. And because that law is indestructible and therefore infinite, we know that the power used by miracle-makers in the past is still available today. Yet, in our modern society, we are brought up to believe only in those things we can logically understand. We are not taught that the Universal Law has limitless potential or that this power is at our disposal and can be used to work miracles in our lives.” – Haha.. It’s all about feeling.

    Have a good day y’all! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Gretta. Do you really have to say them 200 times??? That’s a lot 🙂

      I was trying TOGETHER DIVINE last night though, and I really like the CANCEL OFF one. That will be easy to remember.


      1. Yes 200 times, more even better. If you go for a half hr walk you’ll be able to do it. I’m constantly chanting it in my head now since waking up with only a slight twinge in my neck. They also suggest to write it daily 28 times for 42 days all in capital letters 🙂



      2. Hi C

        I found this and applied it today.

        Please give it a go…

        “I (your name) forgive you (his name) – You please forgive me too and release me.”

        Again it’s 200 times or writing 28 times a day for 42 days.

        I did it today. I loved it.



  3. Hi C,
    If you have to question how many times, it means you have to revisit the numbers. It isn’t the chore. What I really want to say is just feel good and intend and visualize or use switch words or affirm or script. Job is done even in 5 mins. I would also say start small- manifest different things on daily basis. U have manifested his message… manifest something else… His name, his fav song, his fab movie, ur fav animal etc… strengthen ur belief… BELIEVE … if you are still wondering it means there is some resistance. Ask urself what it is… u will get the answer.
    My biggest reason of hidden worry was I am 10 years older to him and there are meant other pretty girls including his crush. Why would it be me? I had to find answers why me…. and keep reminding myself…. to this date… I am so confident on that part. I don’t have to be of younger age group, I have to be my age and confident about it. So switch ur beliefs first..
    It will manifest once you have eradicated sl the reasons “why wouldn’t he be woth you” and the best way to start that is “why would he love to be with you”.

    Love and Light


      1. Yes!! You might have missed my old comment… but I mentioned it once that we both have 10 years younger boys in our lives.
        And I want to mention it again that many times Nina’s posts or your comments are ans to my questions I ask Uni. 😊 you are a beautiful divine soul ( everyone is) but u r one of them who just bring the right things on table….

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Hi Lightline.

        I couldn’t reply to your comment below, but I just wanted to say thanks for your kind words! Made me smile ❤

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Lightline. Yes, I think I want to only do processes when I love them. If its overwhelming it feels more like a chore and then I might be as happy during the manifestation.


  4. Hi Lyly / C

    I liked your posts up above to C.

    Try the new thing I posted I would love to hear how different you are feeling after doing it even after just one day…



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