Protect your awareness from your own negative thoughts and reactions, and you will make significant steps towards a positive lifestyle.
I remember a disagreement with my husband. He had taken offence to my words. When offending the person we love, it’s easy to feel guilty and deserving of that guilt; but I knew I should laugh at the misunderstanding, apologize, clarify my intentions and happily make things right instead of beating myself up.
“How could you not beat yourself up?”
“Don’t you feel bad? How could you not? If you don’t feel bad, doesn’t that mean you’re a bad person?”
These questions completely miss the point and lead to a negative awareness instead of making anything better. They make nothing better and everything worse.
FEELING GUILTY VS. HAPPILY MAKING THINGS RIGHT
Believe it or not, you don’t need to feel guilty to want to make things right. You can simply want to make things right because you want to get along with the person you love. You want to make them happy and never want to see them sad. But you don’t actually have to punish yourself to accomplish this.
When I offended my husband, I decided to show him my true intentions and remained in a good mood myself. I knew he’d see what I truly meant and that it was all a misunderstanding; he misconstrued something I had never actually verbalized. I approached him with a smile, asked him to listen to me (which he already did because I approached him in a positive way), told him what I was trying to say and where the misunderstanding was, and was happy to do it all. He understood and the air immediately cleared. We were both happy. I didn’t blame myself because I am only 50% of every conversation I have. It is also the responsibility of the other side to listen with an open mind.
Today, however, I want to focus on your side and mine. Why is it so easy to want to punish yourself when a misunderstanding happens with your specific person, and how can you avoid this part of relationship conflict resolution?
This is the problem:
When someone is offended by your words, you will actually make things worse if you fall into a black emotional hole of blaming yourself. Think about it – if you start blaming yourself and telling yourself you deserve to feel bad about this misunderstanding, your mind will shut down. You will then actually say the wrong things and make everything worse. Isn’t it better to stay positive in order to remain clear-headed and make things right?
Approaching someone for resolution and being confident in yourself when doing so is only one way of using Law of Attraction to manifest making up after a misunderstanding.
There is also another way, and I’ve also used it plenty.
I remember an instance of a friend taking offense to my words, similarly to the way my husband did years later. Once again, I hadn’t verbalized the exact sentiment my friend inferred but many people, to an extent, operate by “It sounded like you meant this.” (This type of inferring happens when one looks at the world through their own fears, searching for them in every conversation, and that’s why we should never assume anything at all when conversing with others.) I simply thought to myself, “I didn’t mean it, she’ll realize it soon and see me the way she did before this. She is back to being happy.” I decided that this misunderstanding was meaningless, went on about my day and every time it came to mind, I decided that everything was fine between us.
I saw her again later that day. She acted as if nothing had happened and seemed to not even remember our earlier misunderstanding. She was like an entirely different person. Our misunderstanding just disappeared.
In all my years of Law of Attraction practice, I have seen people miraculously change into the perception I had of them in my visualizations of desired events. I have seen the current reality miraculously replaced with my ideal one. At the same time, his creation method implies completely ignoring one’s current reality.
Many people still perceive their current realities to be more powerfully than their desired ones! No. Thoughts are magnetic – how can your current reality change if you don’t believe that? What you want is yours, NOW! This what you should believe, and always believe before seeing results.
As you can see, changing your reality when it comes to other people is created exactly the same as anything else. You just have to be able to see yourself in your desired reality including another person instead of focusing on your mutual current circumstances.
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