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Avoid Negative Self-Talk and Find Self-Love!

Love yourself

I spend a great deal of time talking, coaching and writing about self-love. It gives me both happiness and solace even in the moments I don’t feel like thinking about anything else. It gives me the motivation to never stop wanting and assuming that miracles are mine to experience.

Without self-love, I never would have assumed that I could just hear from my latest romantic interest, placed my phone next to me with the sound on and received a message shortly after. Yet I did. In those instances, I believed in both the Universe and myself. Without self-love, how could I have believed in this being possible for me? An absence of self-love would have made me think it was completely impossible.

Possessing self-love makes Law of Attraction practice seamless. Without effort, it provides magnetic motivation to will our desires into being. This is what I want you to achieve. This is what makes you your own source of motivation, and Law of Attraction will reward you for it. Those who motivate themselves never look for their desires because they choose to believe – and a reward of manifesting them follows.

It’s when we don’t like ourselves that motivation is lost; when we don’t feel deserving or capable of successful manifestation for whatever reason. Certain kinds of self-talk will take away from your self-love and, with that, the motivation to believe in your desires.


Think about this.

Are you sometimes unsure about texting your specific person? If so, you are likely considering it from the place of insecurity. Being out of touch can make you feel empty yet wanting to get in touch comes with a fear of rejection, right? Whenever you feel this way, don’t text! It won’t be from the place of self-love, therefore it won’t be from the place of love for the other person. Doubting ourselves isn’t loving ourselves, and we can only offer what feel; if you offer doubt, you will cause doubt in your specific person.

Instead, you should find self-love first. You should believe your desired relationship is possible before you reach out to your person. (If you don’t, you might fall deeply into disbelief and become discouraged from trying again.)

Texting because you aren’t hearing from someone can only lead to even more of the same. Just sending a text doesn’t warrant an answer if you deeply believe it might not happen. If you fear they might ignore you or are doing so already, don’t text until you’ve started to believe your relationship is possible.

Self-love will accelerate your internalization of that belief.

Don’t send that text if it won’t be from the place of self-love, because it won’t be out of love for the other person either. We can only offer what we feel.


There’s a difference between worrying your person has lost interest or simply wondering if they may have and what it says about your relationship. Worrying means already assuming you won’t get what you want; you already see yourself as someone who can’t keep your person’s interest. Why don’t you believe you’re good enough?

If you’re wondering whether your specific person has lost interest in you while honestly weighing your interest in them, you are simply considering all sides. Maybe this isn’t the person for you or maybe they still are. You’ll see, and you’re find with that. If that’s the way you feel, self-love is there. You are following your true feelings.

The height of self-love is (also) honestly evaluating how much you care about the person while knowing you could manifest love with them or anyone else. You choose. You could manifest a relationship with whomever you wanted, and it will be someone you truly care about. You will truly care to make happy someone who makes you happy – this is how you’ll choose your partner.

And once you’ve chosen this person, you will think about being with them and know that your relationship is set in stone. You will trust the Universe fully. This is the height of love, and self-love.

Please don’t choose negative self-talk or doubt.

Self-love is in you already; it’s waiting in your heart. You just have to find it, and you won’t for as long as negative self-talk feels more natural than giving yourself praise.

And giving yourself praise makes belief in the Universe, yourself and your desire easier!

Belief doesn’t just come to most people. Belief is a choice. Belief takes work! Belief requires consciously deciding that something is important enough to manifest into your life, and it is your responsibility to trust that it will – what is that, if not work? Something so simple that should just be turned over to the Universe is actually so hard to do. How are you to trust so easily?

Well, loving yourself makes that trust easy, because people who love themselves know how much they deserve and, even more importantly, don’t settle for less. Settling for less leads to a deterioration of self-love, and doing it doesn’t make us adult or realistic. Settling for less even once means allowing ourselves to believe we will never be good enough. Once might seem harmless but it will lead to a downward spiral.

Settling for less than you deserve means squandering the happiness you should be pursuing and not repelling.

Love yourself, and you will become an even greater person. Don’t settle for what you don’t want, and you won’t leave room for not getting what you want. Belief in the Universe and self-love will connect all the dots in your life.

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